Sunday, November 22, 2009

Who Really Needs R-E-S-P-E-C-T?

I have just read the most earth-shattering news! I'll quote it directly from the author:

"I sometimes get the question, 'You say women need love and men need respect. Isn't the opposite just as true? Don't gals need respect and guys need love?' My answer is, of course, women need respect and guys need love, but I'm talking about the primary drive in each sex. Sometimes this gets mixed up. Back in the late 1960s, when the feminist movement was hitting its stride, Aretha Franklin released a hit recording entitled 'R-E-S-P-E-C-T,' which clearly sent the message that all women were asking for was a little respect when they got home. Respect is what women needed, and they 'had to have it.'

"'R-E-S-P-E-C-T' became something of a theme song for many women, but what most of them did not realize is that the song was really written by a man -- Otis Redding -- two years before Aretha ever sang it. Otis released the song as a single on August 15, 1965, as his message to his wife. Does the irony of this strike you as it does me? Aretha had the right to sing 'R-E-S-P-E-C-T' from a female point of view, of course. A woman does need respect, and if a man loves her properly, she will get that respect. But the primary meaning in Otis Redding's song is a cry from a man's deepest soul that says respect is what he needs and he's 'got to have it.'

"Aretha Franklin's hit song notwithstanding, I still believe that women want love far more than respect and men want respect far more than love..." (emphasis mine)

Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs (Brentwood, TN: Integrity Publishers, 2004), pp. 47, 48.

I am only just getting into this book, but the advice in it appears to be not only biblical, but effective. I've been shaking my head in agreement all the way through so far.

More later.

By the way, here are the original lyrics to R-E-S-P-E-C-T:

What you want,
Honey, you got it
And what you need,
Baby, you got it.
All I ask is a little respect
when I come home.

You can do me wrong,
Honey, if you want to.
You can do me wrong,
Honey, while I'm gone.
But all I'm askin' for
is a little respect
when I come home.

Hey, L'l Girl,
you're so sweeter than honey.
And I'm about to give you
all my money.
All I'm askin'
is a little respect
when I come home.

Hey, Lil Girl,
you are sweeter than honey.
And I'm about to give you
all of my money.
But all I want you to do
is to give, to give me
respect when I come home.

Respect is what I want.
This is what I need!
Respect is what I want.
Gotta, gotta have it.
This is what I need!

Notice how Aretha turned it all around:

What you want, Baby, I got it.
What you need, you know I got it.
All I'm asking is for a little respect
when you come home.
Hey, Baby, when you come home, Mister

I ain't gonna do you wrong while you're gone
I ain't gonna do you wrong 'cause I don't wanna
All I'm asking is for a little respect when you come home;
Baby, when you come home.

I'm about to give you all my money
And all I'm asking in return, honey
Is to give me my propers when you get home.
Yeah, baby when you get home.

Your kiss is sweeter than honey and, guess what, so is my money.
All I want you to do for me is give it to me when you get home.
Yeah, baby, whip it to me when you get home now.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T: find out what it means to me.
R-E-S-P-E-C-T, take care, TCB*, ohhhh.


*TCB is slang for "Taking care (of) business."